


You’re Not Fine

by lotorotor



Series: Is this a healthy coping mechanism? [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abandonment Issues, Basically I had a bad time and wrote this to cope, Dissociation, Hurt/Comfort, Isolation, Keith cusses, Keith is Not Okay, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Overthinking, Self-Hatred, Trust Issues, and the cussing is linked to his self hatred oops, honestly though me too keith, projecting onto fictional characters as a coping mechanism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-11 21:51:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15325122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lotorotor/pseuds/lotorotor
Summary: “Nothing,” he replied, “I’m fine.”Lotor crossed the room and sank to the ground next to him. He shot him a concerned look.“You don’t seem fine,” he remarked.Lotor is worried about Keith, and he has good reason to. Keith doesn’t want to trust him, but he doesn’t always get what he wants.





	You’re Not Fine

**Author's Note:**

> look, I wasn’t having a good time, and projecting onto fictional characters is my favorite way to cope. Keith is me, I am Keith, but unfortunately I don’t have a Lotor.
> 
> Idk why I’m posting this other than I can’t find a reason not to

“Keith? What’s wrong?” A silky smooth voice asked from behind the dark haired boy where he sat on the ground, knees pulled up to his chest.

“Nothing,” he replied, “I’m fine.”

Lotor crossed the room and sank to the ground next to him. He shot him a concerned look.

“You don’t seem fine,” he remarked.

And considering Keith was staring glassy eyed at the wall and had been for hours, he couldn’t blame him for thinking that. Considering his head was no longer on his shoulders and he’d been floating since before seeking a private corner of the Castle, Keith was decidedly not fine. That didn’t mean he wanted pity.

“I’m fine.” He repeated, not all the way grounded to come up with a more substantial response.

“Keith.” Lotor’s voice had a note of concerned frustration in it. “Can you tell me what happened?”

Keith sighed. “Nothing happened other than me proving once again that I’m fucking useless.”

Lotor stared at him in shock. “What in the blazes are you talking about? You’re far from useless, little red.”

The use of the prince’s nickname for him floating to him from that silver tongue tugged at Keith’s mind, bringing him back to himself a bit more. He merely shrugged in response.

“Okay.” Lotor sighed. “Please tell me who made you feel this way.”

“I did.” Keith said. “I can’t fucking accomplish a simple fucking task. I can’t do anything but disappoint people. I don’t even know why I’m here.”

Lotor reached out and placed a purple hand on his shoulder. Keith tensed, but didn’t shrug him off, so the hand stayed.

“Listen to me. The Red Lion chose you as her Paladin, as did Black. You joined the Blade of Marmora. You are far from useless.”

“They shouldn’t have chosen me. They should have chosen someone who doesn’t fuck everything up. They should have chosen someone grounded.”

Lotor sighed again, then moved the hand from the shoulder so he could pull Keith into a side hug. The man didn’t react beyond a muscle twitch.

“I don’t know what brought this on, but believe me when I say I think you are exceptional. And as long as you feel this way, I’ll be here to tell you that you don’t have to. That you are one of the most exceptional beings I’ve ever met. And if you’re dealing with your mind telling you these things on top of everything else, well, you’re stronger than anyone knows.”

Keith said nothing, though he relaxed by a fraction at Lotor’s words. Losing the strength to stay curled in a ball, he allowed his limbs to loosen, his head dropping onto Lotor’s chest. The prince took the opportunity to wrap him into a more complete hug, his hand stroking his dark mullet.

“Thanks, Lotor,” Keith mumbled against the fabric of Lotor’s shirt. “I don’t know if I believe you but I... I can try to. I guess.”

Purple fingers carded through black strands of hair, the movement all kinds of soothing. “That’s the first step. And more proof of your strength.”

Those were the last words exchanged between them as the exhaustion of fighting his mind caught up to Keith and he began to fall asleep in Lotor’s arms. He hated to admit it, but he’d been comforted. He felt safe and he knew that he could trust Lotor. He hated that he could trust Lotor.

He wasn’t sure he was going to put those feelings into actions.

But for now, he allowed himself to drift off. Allowed himself to be vulnerable and hoped that he wouldn’t regret it. Hoped that Lotor wouldn’t leave, like so many had before him, starting with his mother. Even as he hoped, a part of him whispered that it was inevitable. Lotor would get tired of him. He would abandon him. The doubts were almost enough to make himself wake enough to pull away.

But he didn’t. He let himself sleep.

And when Lotor was still there, still holding him when he woke up, he felt a tiny ember of something begin to glow. He wanted to put it out, but instead, he leaned into the prince’s embrace. He let the spark grow.

He knew he was going to regret this, but he didn’t want to leave Lotor’s steady, safe arms. So he didn’t.


End file.
